Self-Motivated Kids: Creating an Environment Where Children Listen and Cooperate

Thursday, November 3, 2016
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I'm excited to bring you my first official book review! I've been reviewing books here at Fashion & Fiction for awhile now, but never has an author reached out to me and asked me to review their work. I was recently given such an opportunity when Damara Simmons put her brand new book, Self-Motivated Kids: Creating an Environment Where Children Listen and Cooperate, into my hands and asked me to review it on Amazon. I am so glad she did! It was not only fun to write an official review for Amazon, but I personally loved her book immensely and found myself recommending it to so many people. In fact, I felt like I couldn't recommend it enough, that I wanted to review it here as well. I can't wait to tell you why.

Have you heard of the carrot and stick method of motivation? I hadn't before. I found it fascinating. Basically, the carrot and stick method of motivation involves a parent offering a carrot for good behavior and a stick for bad behavior. Sounds pretty typical, doesn't it? I know I've used this method before. I've never taken a stick to my children, of course, but I've definitely used bribery and punishment to elicit good behavior from my them. The carrot and stick method really isn't how I want to parent though and I think many others feel the same way. We want to motivate our children without using manipulation. We want to raise kids that are self-motivated.

After dissecting the carrot and stick method, Damara presents a method of parenting that throws manipulation out the window and teaches our children to be not only self-motivated, but to feel loved and competent. Damara's method is focused, simple and practical and involves what she calls the three Cs. The three Cs are connection, choice and competence. The gist of her method teaches us that when we as parents connect with our children, offer them choices and then nurture their competence, our children are automatically more self-motivated. I love that! It sounds easy, doesn't it? Yet, as parents, those new and those who've been in the trenches for a while, we know it isn't always easy to implement a new method. Thankfully, Damara recognizes that and walks us through the entire method in a concise, clear and easily applicable manner and with a writing style that is easy and enjoyable to read. I found myself saying out loud, "I can totally do this!" I think you will say the same.

This book couldn't have come at a better time. While I would have loved to have it while I was raising toddlers, I find myself in the throes of raising a teenager and a soon-to-be teenager and in need of Damara's method of parenting just as much today as I would have back then. Thankfully, the advice in this book is geared toward children of all ages. If you pick up this book, I think you'll feel the same way I did. There isn't a better time than right now.

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